The sound of a voice so softly singing.

The notes of my secrety soliloquy cut short

A flood of beautiful memories I’ll sort

These sweet melodies I can’t afford

To have what’s so hard to find

Could I wait this time?

In this state of mind?

I was so sweet, plain, pure, and perfect

Am I holding you prisoner to my heart?

Even with all that you’ve learned?

Here’s the truth: you’re still waiting

All this denial, anticipating

I tried to tell you that I was the only

But still you stand there singing out so lonely

Go on.

(come here)

Just go on.

(come closer)

Look up at me,

(i want you to look down on me)

Look down on me,

(having a taste)

Smile at me,

(i’m sorry)

Lie to me,

(i’m not dependable)

Lie to yourself,

(it’s what i do)

Let it be,

(save that for later)

One day you’ll see,

(no way was that true)

I was perfect.

(you’re pretty 19)

It couldn’t be.

(she’s too plain)

It’d never be.

(she’s too pure)

Oh one day you’ll see,

(just a little bit)

I was perfect.

(i think i believe it)

I am perfect.

(i am still mean)

I’d make us perfect,

(i have a bad habit of doing that)

We’d be so perfect,

(that sounds like something i can handle)

Watch us crash,

(i hate that i lead you on)

Oh so perfectly,

(just me being me)

Down in flames.

(I’m the one)

sometimes i really hate myself.

i think i might just

i might just

i might..

break, become broken,

tear this out.

i don’t want to feel anymore.

shut your fuckin mouth.

my heart’s in my throat

i think i’m gonna choke.

your voice is in my head

i think i’ll fuckin choke.

your eyes are in my mind.

it’s fine, i’ll rip mine out.

that smirk creeps onto your face.

i’ll stitch mine up, am i smiling now?

this heart, it’s heavy.

this heart, it burns.

this heart, it’s falling.

this heart?

what heart?

you’re my favorite toy!

you’re the road i always choose.

you’re such a silly boy!

is this considered drug abuse?

impaired mind and judgement!

withdraws without your touch!

longing for my next fix,

i’ll lean on you like a crutch.

i feel like i’m moving so fast when in fact,

i’m moving.

quite.

slow.

i feel like i’ll be just fine but please,

don’t.

let.

go.

i’ll only tell you once,

i don’t do rehab babe!

you don’t think i know

but i can see it in your eyes.

that smile’s a facade,

i can hear it in your lies.

our bodies twist and turn

i can feel it in your thighs.

your movements so high strung,

i’m breathing in your lies.

the tide, it fades out.

your emotions are on the rise

as i just lay here whispering,

“please, feed me more of your lies.”

i laugh at my past thoughts! how ignorant i really am. i laugh at my past thoughts. how ignorant am i really? i’m a silly girl filled with butterflies and rainbows, aren’t i? covered in bliss and sex appeal. cover me in lust, for that is what this is. i’m a funny girl filled with awkwardness, aren’t i? i’m oh so alluring to your type of persona. i’m a stupid girl filled with a need for belonging. i want to please you and i want you to reciprocate.

come a little closer babe, devour my regrets.

come a little closer babe, help me forget.

come a little closer babe, replace my thoughts with sweat.

come a little closer.

hey babe,

come closer.

dressed to impress but nobody’s looking

tried my fucking best and that’s for certain

saw my reflection and wondered if it’s worth it

don’t get dramatic kid, you know that it’s working

smile a bit.

that’s a dead hit.

smile a bit.

bring in your hips.

smile a bit.

attack my lips.

smile a bit.

fucking smile a bit.

come a little closer babe, i want to breathe in your scent.

come a little closer babe, can you feel my heart skip?

come a little closer babe, my patience has been spent.

come a little closer.

hey babe,

come closer.

can i play with you?

can i trace my fingers across your skin?

if i promise to be good, will you let me in?

i want your eyes to light up as you flash that grin.

i want to gaze up at the sky and just let my head spin.

i can see the gears turn in your head when you stare.

the way you play with my hands when nobody’s there.

oh the things i’d do if we had a room alone!

there’s parts of my body that only you could own!

you drive me insane!

what do you really think of me?

you drive me insane!

is there something holding you back from me?

you drive me insane!

will you let me captivate you?

you drive me insane!

won’t you let me give my all to you?

can i confide in you, from one writer to another?

do you ever feel like you feel too much?

that every emotion you have raging inside you is heightened?

that what you feel in your heart would probably explode a “normal” person?

i feel like when i hurt inside,

my body’s rotting from within.

my organs turn black,

my chest caves in.

and when i’m happy?

it’s like i’m too happy, if there could ever be such a thing!

my heart aches from the excitement i feel!

especially the excitement i feel for you..

don’t let me down!

please don’t let me get so low!

it’s too late, you know i need you now!

i can’t hide what my heart’s already shown!

the whirlwind of snow outside became too exciting to ignore,

the fury of that blizzard, quite violently, blew open the door.

my eyes no longer against the glass but locked in a gaze with yours,

i have no regrets, merely wishes to be closer to you, more than ever before.

your soft touch is like fire against my skin!

my back arches as your fingers glide across me!

i love to see that devilish grin

as i move in closer towards the warmth of your body.

your eyes are ablaze with passion and longing

my mind is amazed at this since of belonging.

everything in the world just feels so right!

please, would you let me lay with you tonight?

i’d love to lie down and stare up at the stars,

i’d love to wake up being held in your arms.

i’d love to whisper “goodmorning” and kiss you gently,

i’d even love to hear “baby, it’s still too early, just lay with me.”